Overcoming-Words Matter #3

MissYs Merch Here

I was doing so good and consistently with creating content for this blog, and was highly motivated by all the goals I had in mind to accomplish. And then, Boom! My world went through what felt like a whirlwind. My 3 children (and I, too)  all had life experiences of their own that needed my full attention almost simultaneously. So, let's just say I got distracted, and rightfully so! I'm very grateful that I can be there for my children in the capacity that they need me to be and that it's not limited by my personal beliefs, personal feelings, or even work schedule. To me, that is a big blessing. 

Within that time, even though I was giving full attention to my family's individual needs, I kept striving to complete my personal goals/work, and business needs. After a few days of consistency (toward work and personal ), I learned that I just couldn't do it all at the moment and a break was in order. I'm so proud of myself because this time I listened to my body. I took a break for the holiday weekend (which still worked due to my daughter's birthday party and a Monday holiday the next day). Finally, it was time to get back in motion. Back to work on a Tuesday morning, on schedule, like things should be. 

Then the struggle came even more in picking a topic of fear to discuss. What fear should I pick this week.......Why was this a struggle when I was so excited and motivated the last few weeks? Well, I kept trying, and as I sat in silence reviewing the family matter that we overcame and came to A conclusion, why keep trying to discuss a fear when I can discuss how I Overcame the things we face the most? Maybe if we look at it from another angle, we can speak more positively on the same subject and gain more strength from the same experience. Maybe that goes hand in hand with the last blog where finding the lesson from your past experiences was discussed. 

So, what did I overcome that was so great? Well, for this particular experience, I overcame My Tongue. Yes, I overcame my mouth speaking (saying) things that are hurtful (and can have a lifelong effect) to my children (and those close to me) because they did something "wrong". I resisted the urge to lash (verbally/physically) out and instead became a stable support for my children through the "wrong" decisions/actions that kept happening back to back. 

As I grew up, we didn't really have much room for mistakes. We also didn't call it a mistake or an experience. Instead, it labeled us as disobedient, ornery, and rebellious, and an immediate, sometimes harsh punishment was in order because we didn't obey. What I think we tend to not realize is that the little humans that we make are not just ours as we see them, but they are  Soul (just as we are). These souls have their own inward desires (as we do). When they are small, we can influence their environment 100%. As they grow, with more mobility and access to the world, their own Inward Voice begins to speak up really loud. Then appears the crossroad of a child doing what the parent demands or following what the heart wants. Even if it's just to stay outside a little longer. Typically (as we know), the heart wins. 

Words Matter

What we speak, the words we choose to speak to our loved ones, and our following generation matter. Especially after a mistake or a life experience, as I like to call it. I choose to encourage them that we all have these moments where we want to try something we've never done before. Even if those we trust tell us not to. Whether it's a drug or sex, a different crowd of friends that seems intriguing, breaking curfew, etc., we are all presented with these desires. Even as adults. We always have 2 lanes of choices and decisions to make when encountering these common situations. Regardless of which decision my kids choose, my job is to explain the pros and cons of the choice they decided to follow. I also chose to support their decision. At times, my support is positive reinforcement or a simple high five to say good decision. Other times, my support is responding to a phone call for help (with no judgment)  or helping pick up the pieces to move forward. Either way, my parental option is to offer words of peace, love, and support, especially to my children. I explain all that to say - Words Matter. Let's be conscious of the words we speak during times of disappointment. It's good to practice on employees or those we encounter daily. It's even better when we can give this grace to our own children (and family).

Overcoming my tongue is a challenge I've faced for years. It wasn't until I realized the residual damage that words said to me, even years ago, affected the way I continued to operate since they were spoken to me. This helped me to realize that the things I choose to say in someone else's moment can negatively affect them. Or, they can also set a high trajectory for the things to come. 

The hardest part is that no one or thing forces you to speak positively. It's simply Your Choice

-Let Love Work

Thanks for reading, and feel free to comment!